Amy Schumer sat down for a revealing and sad heart to heart on Super Soul Sessions with Oprah Winfrey. The full figured and fiercely feminist comedian discussed some personal things and also revealed how she lost her virginity. Amy revealed that her first time hadn’t, in fact, been consensual!
The 36-year-old actress lost her virginity at the age of 17 by her then-boyfriend. In an episode of SuperSoul Conversations with media mogul, Oprah Winfrey, she stated that she lost her virginity while she was asleep, and ‘that’s not okay’.
The uncomfortable and provocative topic was previously explored in her 2016 memoir, The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo, but it’s not something she has openly discussed before this.
The Trainwreck star said she had been penetrated while she was asleep by her boyfriend at the time. However, before she made any firm implication, she did assert that the incident falls in what she calls the “gray-area-rape” or “grape” category.
According to Schumer, a “grape” incident is one that cannot formally be classified as rape but still has the characteristics of that kind of sexual assault. She pointed out that the incident was definitely non-consensual, even if it wasn’t done with particularly malevolent intentions in mind.
The actress said, “I didn’t consent, and for me, I lost my virginity while I was asleep – and that’s not okay.”
Apparently, the couple had been sleeping next to each other when Schumer was awoken by penetration. The former boyfriend didn’t think he did anything wrong and only said, “I thought you knew.” She didn’t respond to him at the time because, ironically, she didn’t want to hurt his feelings.
The star said, “He was my boyfriend. I loved him. I had to comfort him.”
She repressed her anger at shock during the episode; she said she did this because “as women, we’re really trained not to get angry.” She also said that she hadn’t thought about the traumatizing episode after that because she couldn’t bear to.
The fact that she wasn’t able to straight up label it as rape also caused her confusion while dealing with it. She was supremely confused about how she felt about her boyfriend afterwards too. “You think when that happens you say, ‘Okay, well, this isn’t someone I want to see rotting in a jail cell, but what he did to me was wrong’”, she said.
Schumer definitely agreed it was a non-consensual sexual act and went on to explain how labels play a role in incidents like these. She said everyone tries to label experiences so they can ‘store’ them in their minds and find concrete ways of dealing with them. However, everyone is hesitant to label themselves as rape victims because a host of negative and shameful drama can follow.
The comic actress concluded the heart to heart by saying she was finally ready to accept what happened to her was rape, which was a very brave move on her part. The actress mournfully said, “I personally — I feel like I lost my virginity through rape. I didn’t consent, we hadn’t discussed it.”
The #MeToo movement, championed by global superstars such as Meryl Streep and Emma Watson, has been bringing numerous incidents of sexual assault to light. Perpetrators of sexual assault cannot ignore the steadily growing narrative that’s giving power back to victims.
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